things i currently need #7

There's a blizzard a-comin'. My metropolitan area and the rest of the East Coast is expected to receive more than 24 inches of snow starting tomorrow. So without further ado, here's what I currently need: You, Seychelles. I need you. And you, too, Santorini. Let's not forget about you, my dear Maldives. What was that, my sweet Santorini? …

Several Things This Square Peg is Not Here For.

(See my mother's list here.) Passive-aggressiveness. Choose a side and we shall deal accordingly. But you can't be both. I won't allow it in my presence. Rudeness. A door shouldn't shut in my face because you failed to hold it open for me when I was behind you. Wrong on so, so many levels. Men who …

shopgirl?

I don't know what it is about entering a store and looking through racks of clothes and trying them on that fills me with pre-root canal-esque queasiness, fear, and disdain. Most of my friends hear my "I detest shopping" complaint and are shocked that my recent weight loss didn't translate into a complete change in mindset, …

A Conversation.

December: So you're really killing 'em, huh? 16 degrees?  January: Please. After that 75 degree mumbo jumbo you were pulling, I had to remind those chumps that we're in winter. December: Sheesh. Calm down. January: Don't tell me to calm down. You had people wearing shorts in wintertime. Shorts! I mean, are you kidding me? …