My name is This Square Peg, I am an African Woman, and I cannot eat spicy foods.

{Moment of silence}

It’s weird, right? That when I eat anything spicy I see my life flashing before my eyes? It’s been like this since I was a wee lass. (Apparently, I’m also Irish.) I have memories of my mother cooking milder versions of the same foods because some of us (read: me) couldn’t take the peppery heat. One time, in my haste to inhale the Chinese food in front of me, I accidentally swallowed an entire red pepper. I was in bed for the rest of the night. There may have been hallucinations. Seriously.

So why am I able to cover my egg white omelets with Sriracha sauce and

For Today - Affordable Flavor (Wood)
I bow to you, my benevolent master.

eat with abandon? Even when my lips burn after eating, as they now are, I typically am able to withstand the heat after a bit. Am I building some kind of resistance, finally, to spiciness?

No. I can only handle Sriracha. Nothing else. So, so strange. In the end, I add my inability to largely eat spicy foods to the list of other things that I, as an African Woman, was denied:

  • Discernible hips
  • An actual derrière (although, thanks to squats, something might be growing back there)

Just unfair.

Are you like me? Or can you handle the heat?

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